I fired my boss.
She was all about long to-do lists and unrealistic expectations regarding the time needed to fulfill those lists. She fed on more and better and I wouldn’t mind her as a co-worker, but she sucked as a boss.
Her name is Ambition and she was shocked when I said “no more”. She didn’t grovel and she didn’t demand, but she did quietly attempt to reassert her position. But I was prepared. We have, after all, spent a lifetime together.
Up until now, it hadn’t occurred to me that I needed a new boss. I thought that self employment required Ambition… that without her I would wallow in my inertia… that I would never finish what I began… that I would not meet my financial obligations. But Ambition didn’t fix any of those challenges. She only added a sense of “not-enoughness” to my failures. And added items like self improvement to the lists.
Not that I don’t want to work on my self. I value inner work. I just want to do it in a different environment.
Which brings me to the real challenge. What kind of a boss do I need?
I have been drifting in a void since I fired Ambition. I am not familiar with any other form of motivation and in my either/or way, I imagine total chaos without her. But I’ve taken the leap now and I’m not turning back.
What kind of boss do you have? Does She/He foster collaboration? Establish reasonable timelines? Inspire you? If so, I want to hear how it’s done. I’m ready for a workplace change in the new year and I’m not going to make resolutions. That was the old way. Instead, I’m looking for a 2016 Intention and you can help.
The movement of awareness from (8) ‘the Boss to (5) ‘the Observer can be a liberating but challenging move, it may require some imagined loss of security and control… those do not make very exciting bed-partners anyway… as strange as it may seem, you are loved for the ‘otherness’ that you are!
Aha! Very astute observation! My work with the Enneagram deepens…
I wonder if there’s a word for “Compassionate Yet Firm Partner with My Creative Self”? That’s the gal I want in my corner this year!
That’s it exactly, Sara! What comes to my mind is the Good Mother: nurturing AND able to set reasonable limits and yet that still doesn’t have the equality piece of partner. But maybe we are getting closer…